ISLAM AND TOLERANCE THE EDUCATIONAL PATTERN OF COMMUNITY IN KUTUK VILLAGE, KUDUS

1 Toto titi tentrem kertoraharjo is a Javanese proverb which means to be peaceful. This terminology has a very deep philosophical message. As humans being, we have to organize ourselves and be careful in order to achieve peaceful in life. points of 73.83 (within the range of 1-100) which considers in high category. The index number has improved compared with last year data when it was only at 70.90. The harmony index in 2019 is lower if it is compared with the index in 2015, that was only 75.36. Therefore, the society cannot be complacent remembering from the sociology point of view, the condition of plurality of community will lead to two indications, i.e. conflict and integration (Setiadi and Kolip 2011: 56).


Introduction
Indonesian is known as the plural nation which was constructed from different society but manage to keep peaceful which in Javanese terms is called toto titi tentrem kertoraharjo 1 . It was proven on the empirical evidence from the survey of religious harmony index by the Centre of Research and Development of the Ministry of Religious Affairs (MORA). It has the index Setara Institute during the period of 2014-2019 shows that there were 846 incidents of violence of religious freedom with 1,060 actions. Ironically, the phenomenon of religious commodification becomes trend center. Moreover, all of the related things are covered in the name of religion, including intolerance actions. It became common as the actions were reviewed from sociology point of view, that religion has constructive function, where religion bonds usually are stronger than blood relations and heredity (Wach 1958: 128). This function is usually misused by becoming issues about religion as scapegoat to get the sense of togetherness and shaping the existing conflict.
One of the examples of intolerant cases which takes the public focus was incident of Tolikara which caused a person killed and injured other 11 persons on 17 July 2015. The other was Tanjung Balai conflict of North Sumatra in 2016 which impact the damage of two viharas and eight pagodas. These show that the real condition of the community in plurality environment is on the crisis. These seem ironic with the existing of several activities of cross religion. These situations cannot be denied as sign of the failure of education. Therefore, it is crucial to find the patterns of education which are able to transmit the tolerance values. Up to now, the education is still believed as a problem solver in life. So, it needs to expand the concept of education which is oriented to tolerance and based on Islam. And also, in Islamic tolerance education, the purity of akidah and shariah cannot be tainted by tolerance practice.
Moreover, the appearance of several intolerance cases covered by religion shows less interest of community in studying to be living together harmoniously. Moreover, these cases indicate the failure of first socialization agents (environment and family) in transmitting the inclusive and tolerance values (Ma'arif 2011: 8). It worth to create an offer to empower again the family and community environment as executor of tolerance education. In fact, the education is a compound processing which involves the family, school, as well as youth association in which Ki Hajar Dewantoro called as education of Tri Sentra (in Indonesian language known as Tri Sentra Pendidikan).
To develop tolerance in the middle of plurality, the community needs a reference, where the relation among people of society is uncontrolled based on majority and minority. This condition can be found in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus, where the community with various religious backgrounds (Islam, Protestantism, and Buddhism) are able to live harmoniously in all aspects. It is agreed that that Kutuk is a small village in Kudus city, but it is a place where the tolerance values are applied.
One of the images of the harmonious relationship between Muslim and Buddhist in Kutuk Undaan Kudus is seen on the celebration of one Syawal, where both parties are visiting each other, apologizing, as well as saying "Eid Mubarak". In celebrating of Wesak in Vihara Vajri Bodhi Manggala at Kutuk, Muslim community help the preparation and the youths from organization of IPNU -IPPNU (student association of Nahdlatul Ulama) serve as the receptionists without following the ceremonial of religion inside Vihara. It shows clear indications that this village has a fantastic pattern of Islamic tolerance education. The evidence can become one prototype in creating the pattern of Islamic tolerance education in pluralistic society. Therefore, this article will answer how the condition of religious harmony in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus was created and how it can be the patterns of tolerance education based on Islam in the community of Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus.

LITERATURE REVIEW
Number of studies on tolerance education has indeed been carried out by many researchers. Due to its role, education is still believed to be very relevant as a problem solver for life problems including to solve the intolerance problems among religious communities. This has increasingly arisen researchers' interest to conduct further and deeper research. One of them is a research written by Puput Dwi Lestari entitled "Toleransi dalam Keragaman: Studi Kasus Masyarakat Desa Gatak, Jawa Tengah", published in Muasarah: Jurnal Kajian Islam Kontemporer, Vol. 1, No. 1, 2019. This article describes the condition of religious harmony in the village of Gatak, Central Java. In fact, this harmonious condition is influenced by the awareness, within the surrounding community, that humans are social beings who need the existence of other people. Another factor that influences harmony in Gatak Village is the effort of community leaders who always try to create harmony among their residents (Lestari 2019: 44).
Another related research is entitled "Penerapan Karakter Toleransi Beragama pada Masyarakat Cigugur Kuningan yang Pluralis" written by Elisabeth Djuniasih and Aceng Kosasih, which was published in Jurnal Pendidikan Karakter on the April 2019 edition IX. No. 1. The article reveals the unifying factors for the Cigugur people who have various religious backgrounds, but they can live side by side peacefully. In fact, they respect each other because they have blood ties. It is also supported by religious leaders who become role models for the surrounding community. Various community activities such as Eid celebrations, Christmas and Seren Taun (marking new agricultural year) ceremonies become moments for the community to cooperate without disturbing worship activities. This has become a means of tolerance learning for children and adolescents (Djuniasih and Kosasih 2019: 1).
By looking at the above literatures, especially in the terms of tolerance education, it can be said that this research is not the newest category. Even so, this research will give contribution to the development of Islamic education, especially in terms of re-empowering families and communities as part of educational institutions to transmit the values of tolerance. Moreover, we will show a pattern of Islamic-based tolerance education in the village of Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus by identifying the various components in it. By taking the research object in the form of Islamic-based tolerance education in families and communities and using a case study approach, it seems that this current research has never been conducted by other researchers.

CONCEPTUAL FRAMEWORK
Tolerance in Islam is an important topic as it related to the situation when Islam gets a lot of critics such as intolerance religion, discriminative, or radical. In fact, Islam is mercy for all of the world. So, alternative education as an effort to accompany the Muslim community to be tolerant for showing tolerant Islamic character is crucial. The tolerance education based on Islam is the effort to develop the respect and cooperation in the differences with the spirit of harmony and humanity based on Islamic values as the blessings for the world. It indicates that the tolerance education based on Islam, the purity of Aqedah and shariah could not be contaminated with intolerance. Here, the different of tolerance education based on Islam with other tolerance education in general is visible.
According to John Hick, all of religions in relative terms are the same and nothing is better from other because it is manifestation from the only reality (Hick 1989: 36). He also said that in the house of worship except for Christian, actually has been the same condition with what happened in the church. And the most important that they adore the same god with the different designation (Hick 1980: 45).
Islam admitted the religious plurality as part of sunatullah, but Islam does not see all religions are the same. Because there is fundamental difference theologically among the religions. So, the tolerance in Islam has certain limits such as limit to social affairs and not entering into ubudiyah (worship area). As stated by Hikmat bin Yasir who said that tolerance is a good action that can create the feeling of love and hatred towards others (Yasin 1992: 2).
In the history, Islam always shows its tolerance. We can see the incident of Madinah, where the Prophet Muhammad ever releases the Madinah charter that guaranteed the religious freedom of Jews as the community. The article in the Madinah charter does not contain any elements of discrimination. In fact, it contains with the benefit for all people. The area of social life has discussed inside the Madinah charter in the article 37 which mentioned that the Jew and Muslim give the advice for each other and also do good things without sin. This article was identified as the norm that organize the public relations system of Madinah in that time, where everybody from different social communities and religious background have the equal status and everyone can do their social functions (Pohan 2014: 121).
The history also records that non-Muslim has the same protection as what is given to Muslim. One time when a leader of Mongols caught the Muslims and non-Muslim in the battle, he offered to release only the Muslims. Then a famous ulama, Ibn Taimiyah, was asked of his fatwa (opinion on an issue). He assumes that the offer cannot be accepted and he instructs the Muslims to fight until the prisoners of Muslim and non-Muslim is getting off (Osman 1996: 22).
Moreover, at the beginning of settlement in Madinah, Prophet Muhammad ever had a Jew secretary. Prophet Muhammad needs his skills because of his ability to master the Hebrew and Syriac language. So, the Prophet Muhammad and his community, that accept his prophet messages, build the political community with another religion clearly, formally and openly, including with the Jews (Sukardja 2014: 104). Several facts of the history also show that the tolerance built in Islam is at the social level and not related with the worship (ubudiyah).
The tolerance is unformed easily and naturally, but it should be tried and developed consciously, so it will be an important part in the social framework. It cannot be grown in the passivity condition. So, education is a must. The transmission process of tolerance values can be implemented through re-empowerment of the family and the society. Because the education is a process for learning to be, not just learning about. Therefore, Albert, with his Social learning Theory revealed that the aspects studied by someone, mainly related with social and moral learning, occurs through imitation and modelling. It has been occurring in the family environment and the community around (Bandura 1977: 17-22). Supported by the Theory of Piaget that the development of children is not only influenced by potency or the environment, but it is the result of interaction among them (Piaget 1978: 77-78).
We can take the wisdoms from the education model of children in Japan, where the role of parents is very significant in nurturing their children characters. This is commonly known with the term ''Kyoiku Mama''. It means a mom who give full responsibility for teaching their children in the education of characters and ethics. The system of character education implemented with giving the direct example to their children (Mulyadi 2014: 69). This is in line with the result of the Hildred research by the title of the Javanese Family, that mother is always teaches about social procedures to their children (Geertz 1989: 103). Looking at this concept, it is clear that the role of family is very important in the education.
The research of Dewey showed that the children education occurred in the family before the industrializations in big city took place. According to Dewey, the children's daily life in family actually says about the world they face and feel. In the family, children were studying what is needed by society. the community was not teaching directly but through the parents. After the occurrence of industrialization, the parents should go to work. The formal education that he called as new education finally occurs (Dewey 1966: 5).
The goal of the school is that the children's daily experiences can make them grow and develop in the situation of community where they live (Dewey 2009: 22). But, the more of complexity of community development, the goal has changed. Because the children are not the center anymore and the aim of education is replaced by lessons. The given lessons are based on a knowledge principal formulated and interpreted out of children's experience. It became a reason that it needs the family empowerment and the society to participate in becoming the executor of tolerance education. In addition to the family, the society should become the successful implementation team of tolerance education. Because someone will be socialized with the applied rules in the community environment (Setiadi and Kolip 2011: 181).
So, the tolerance education has the important position in the community because it can be a part to create people's personality including to grow the respect and tolerance. Usually, the community in village has a religious leader as a role model. It seems that the religious leader has control over the peace formation. It proved when Munawir Sadzali (1983)(1984)(1985)(1986)(1987)(1988)(1989)(1990)(1991)(1992)(1993) was the Minister of Religion, he ever asks religious leaders to look for the way to implement the mandate of GBHN (Garis Besar Haluan Negara) 1983 about the single principle for religious organization without reducing the power of faith. It becomes the strong reason to empower the society again as agent social of change.

RESEARCH METHOD
This research was conducted in Kutuk village, Undaan, Kudus from October to December 2019. The focus of this research is the Muslim community of Kutuk village, Undaan, Kudus. This research inquiries a pattern of education that is able to transmit the values of tolerance based on Islam and to identify the various components in it. That education pattern will be found by utilizing the qualitative field methods with a case study approach. The approach carefully investigates a program, event, activity, or a group of individuals in order to find the pattern (Creswell 2018: 14).
The data collection technique used by researchers to find the polarization of Islamicbased tolerance education in the village of Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus, were non-measurement techniques; namely researchers do not take measurements to collect data (Ali 2011: 117). The data collection instruments used in this study were several qualitative data collection methods; namely observation, interviews and documentation (McMillan and Schumacher 2010: 343). In order that the data to be scientifically accountable, the researcher concerns with the confirmation by using data triangulation, method triangulation, and theory triangulation. Furthermore, the data will be analyzed using qualitative data analysis techniques, including data reduction, data display, making conclusion, and verification.

The Harmonious Condition in Kutuk Village
Kutuk is a village among of 16 villages in Undaan sub district in Kudus district of Central Java Province, located in southeast of Undaan. It is in fact one of the villages in the end part of southeast of Kudus, adjacent with Pati. In the north, it is bordered by Undaan Kidul village. In the east, it is bordered by Wegil village, Pati. In the south, it is bordered by Prawoto, Pati and in the west, it is bordered by Glagahwaru and Terangmas villages. Topographically, the Kutuk Village consists of lowlands with an altitude of 10 meters above sea level.
The majority of Kutuk community are adherents of Islam (Muslim) about 5,977 persons. Largely, they were obedient in following Nahdlatul Ulama' Islamic organization and some small percentage are followers of Muhammadiyah. Kutuk has Buddhists community too, although the number is not as much Muslim. However, Kutuk is a village with biggest Buddhist population in Kudus, about 461 persons. Not only Islam and Buddhism, the village also has Catholicism adherents, about 3 persons.
In addition to these diverse religious backgrounds, Kutuk has community adherent to Adam religion, which is believed by tribe of Samin. All of them are living in alley in front of Kutuk's cemetery, with Samin's condition has interest to follow current development. Moreover, Samin's children of Kutuk has followed formal education.
Therefore, Government of village cannot find exactly the number of Samin followers' existence. For administrative purpose, advocates of Adam religion choose to classify themselves being follower of Buddhism in their identity card.
Various existing of religion difference is responded positively by Kutuk community of Undaan, Kudus. They were seeing to the difference as a natural thing and it does not need necessarily an issue. It seems that the religious difference is addressed by processing the sense supported by awareness to be tolerant, so it will create the balance. This is suitable with the principle living of Javanese people, in community social living, the top of highest progress will achieved if living together can run with principle of harmony, respect, and tolerate (Handayani 2008: 66).
The harmonious condition of religious people in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus is considered as very good. Moreover, throughout history, it has never happened intolerance conflict. One of the pictures of harmonious relationship between Muslim and Buddhist in Kutuk can be seen in the celebration of 1 Syawal (Islamic event to celebrate the feast day-Eid Mubarak), both of parties visit each other, apologizing, as well as greeting the happy Eid.
The existence of Buddhism in Kutuk also can be seen from the establishment of Vihara Budha Santi in 1967 and Vihara Vajra Bodhi Manggala in 1994. Both have religious educational institutions special for children called Sunday school of Buddhist. Moreover, Buddhist children also are fulfilled their necessary about their religious education in the elementary school of Kutuk. Here, the whole community has freedom to implement their worship and rituals based on their religious affiliations, with the compliance of mutual respects and not interfere each other.
The visible harmony of Kutuk leads the culture of "take and give." The community give positive interpretation on tolerance, where tolerance is not enough with letting and not hurting person or another group. It needs support and help toward the existence of person or another group. One of the examples is giving permission of Wasiak celebration which centered in Vihara Vajra Bodhi Manggala. Various support appears from Muslim society. Mothers around Vihara take role as chef and gentleman help the venue setting around Vihara yard. Certainly, the Muslims do not follow the religion ceremonial and rituals inside the Vihara. Uniquely, the person asked to be receptionist in this agenda is Muslim youth who incorporated in organization of IPNU-IPPNU (Students association of Nahdlatul Ulama). This condition also occurred when Muslim celebrate the night of Eid al-Fitr with event of celebration with takbiran.
The villagers have high solidarity with humanity, without considering religion difference as an issue. They realize that they live in the middle of community with diverse religious backgrounds, so they should be able to socialize well. It is appropriate with the concept that human is creature of dualism. On one side, human is individual creature, and the other side, human is part of community. Finally, it can be said that there is no one who live without support of a community. The real evidence is seen at the time of the tribute of death, commonly called layat (visiting the family whose member passed away). All of the community come to the funeral home with intention to condolence and pray.
The practice of cycle of death in the selametan tradition is just like what was revealed by Clifford Gertz, the first thing should do is calling Modin (someone who is able to lead the religious procedures). Second, conveying the news around of area that someone has passed away. If the death occurred in the afternoon or night, they will wait until the next morning to start the funeral process (Geertz 1976: 68). Referring to cultural type, the result of Clifford Geertz research, Kutuk community can be classified as Abangan society (the Javanese people who adherent to Islam with limited knowledge and piety).
The unique of the difference among Muslim, Buddhist or Christian is invisible in every agenda. For example, non-Muslim community

The Pattern of Tolerance Education in Kutuk
Kutuk villagers are very tolerance community. It can be seen there the pattern of tolerance education within the community of Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus that reflects the synergy from family, school, and community. Indeed, education is not always formal and visible like the implementation of tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus. It is visible in avowals of Kutuk's children that they are able to behave in tolerance in the middle of various existing differences because of the outcome of their parents' nurtures. It is visible, parents in this village realize their role as educator for their children. Children in Kutuk are taught by their parents about how to behave with the fellow and older people. The design of tolerance education based on Islam in the family is unstructured like formal education; however, it tends to more supple and based on strong emotional bond between children and parent.
Commonly the methods are used by parents in teaching tolerance to their children in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus, such as: First, introducing diversity since early childhood. The tolerance values and understanding are taught with the way to create togetherness and harmony in the family environment. The parents stimulate their children to be ready to accept the existence of others. Then, parents introduce self-difference of their children with other family members. It started with the simple things like the difference of food tastes. Therefore, the children will realize the existing differences in every person, and it does not need to make the problem of the difference because difference is normal. These things are equilibrated with avoiding of differentiating habit. For example, teaching their children to honor the older person by familiarizing children with kissing the hand of the older person when shaking hands without seeing their religious background. It is effective because the features displayed in children era are easy to believe. Some children are undoubted about ways or ideas that have been taught. This condition can be utilized to create the good habituations. Second, parent do not limit the children association and friendships. In Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus, parents let their children to interact with anyone. Even, they do not have the slightest worries about the unstable of faith and Islam of their children as effect of hanging out with their friends with different religion. Even, the parents teach their children not to select the friend. So, in Kutuk, we will see the harmonious relationship between Muslim children and non-Muslim children, even when they are playing, studying and other activity without seeing the religion difference. Discretion and opportunity of children to socialize without looking at difference religion is done by the parent, one of the methods is very simple such as accepting their children's friends come without differentiating their religion background. All are treated same and fair. However, this freedom given by the parent to their children is still covered with supervision and attention.
Third, teaching the children to share since childhood. Kutuk Village has tradition that contains with sharing each other like tradition of slametan. The community usually organize selametan when they get grace or celebrate certain days such as day of birth, four months Ningkepi (the events of fourth months of pregnancy according to Javanese tradition), and Mitoni (the events of seven months of pregnancy according to the Javanese tradition). So, since the children were in the womb, they were introduced with mutual sharing. These activities have done by previous people, and the next generation are only imitating.
One of the things looks in activity of bancaan weton (human's birthday based on the Javanese calendar). Usually, the parents will distribute the traditional cake or just porridge to their neighbors without seeing their religion background. Directly, the children will see how their parent is sharing without making an issue of difference religion. Furthermore, it is seen when a child brings the snacks while playing with their friends. Generally, the mother who accompanies their playing children will teach them to share by the words "rencange paringi nggeh dek" ("please give your friends too, my son"). Evidently, this small thing is very positive effect for teaching the children to behave tolerance.
Fourth, teaching the children to survive. Parents of Kutuk, Undaan, kudus, have thought their children survive with creating religious atmosphere at home. The strategic that is applied by parents with Majority of Nahdlatul Ulama is through habituation of amaliyah such as yasinan, tahlilan, and berjanjen since childhood. It is felt by most of Kutuk community as accurate strategic for maintaining faith and Islam. Moreover, for the followers of Nahdlatul Ulama, the teaching to survive is always considered in safe point because there is no incident which Muslim people has been converting to other religion until now. Fifth, du'a (prayer). It is the important point which is considered by parents as the most important of education and not allow to be left. They believe the existence of blessing in every du'a. So that, the parents are always praying their children to be godly child personally and socially.
Aside from family, tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus is taught in schools by exampling and teaching all of subjects too. The teachers at formal schools in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus, show their self as a model for their students. Besides that, Elementary schools in Kutuk Undaan kudus also divide religion subject into Islamic subject and Buddhism Subject. They are learning religion and consistent with their religion. From this school scope, children are used to find the difference and they also used to respect, admitting, and supporting the difference. So, there is no wrong if school is considered as human workshop because school is institution of specialist education, which is found the value transmission process inside it.
One more important thing, community also become a place for studying tolerance. Kutuk Village has community with different ages category. Therefore, the teaching of tolerance based on Islam in community is adjusted based on its age category. Several Islamic educational institutions which participate in teaching tolerance to community is adjusted also based on children age category, youth and elder.
In children category, they are taught to behave to tolerate through implementation of education in TPQ (non-formal Quran study educational institution). This institution is special education institution for children, which teaches about reciting the procedure of Holy Quran well. Apart from that, this institution also guides the development of students moral, including how about the manners towards others and older. One of the used methods is to give advice. Generally, children who study in Islamic elementary school have special hatred towards children who study in elementary school, and conversely. In this situation, the teachers give some advice.
The education of tolerance for children is also implemented through activities by reciting in Mushola (small mosque). Generally, Children in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus will recite to the Mushola Here, they are taught to recite the holy Quran well and truly. Not only this, but every Tuesday night also they are always taught about prayer procedure which is termed with fasholatan. Every Friday Night, it will be held yasinan 2 and tahlilan 3 and also reciting barzanji (reciting history about Prophet's life and prayers) together.
In this way, the children are created to be good moral children; how to behave with kyai and ustadz has been designed in such ways through habit. And also, they have to orderly queue when they will recite the holy Quran with the kyai as a habit. Moreover, the reading of Al barzanji also has an impact on the development of a tolerant attitude because what they read is the history of the prophet Muhammad and his family who are role models for Muslims, including in matters of tolerance. Evidently, these small things like this are building their awareness about the importance of patience, mutual respect and appreciating the difference. This effort is not only to teach tolerance but also to defense the children are holding faith tightly.
The implementation of tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus for young people is implemented through the youth empowerment using youth organizations. For creating the youth independent, it should begin by giving confidence and opportunity. They are trusted to be executor of peer education. It is 2 Yasinan is an activity to read Surah Yasin which is carried out simultaneously to pray for people who have died. In this era, the yasinan tradition is used as a gathering of taklim and weekly dhikr for the community and is used as a medium for da'wah so that people become closer to Allah and more familiar with the surrounding community.
3 Tahlil is the activity of reading a series of verses from the holy Quran and thayyibah sentences (Tasbih, Tahmid Tahlil and Takbir) where the reward of the reading is given to the spirits (deceased) mentioned by the reader or the owner of the hajat. Tahlilan is usually performed on certain days, such as seven consecutive days from the death of a person, day of the 40 th , 100 th , or 1000 th . Tahlilan is also often performed regularly on Friday nights. felt to be an effective way in instilling tolerance towards the youth in Kutuk. Friends on the same age are teachers who are often useful and success in community.
In daily life, the impact of friends with same age are materialized by 'while walking'' without planning and without tight evaluation. The influence can be clearly visible in the youth's organization. This influence of friends on the same age can be understood because it is done not as instruction or rigid lesson, but in having life. Except, friends with same age are not dictating and not ordering. The climate of equality contains sympathy, and the sympathy simplifies the person to find value, appreciating the meaning of life and developing mutual respect. All these are to enrich the values (Idris 2014: 426).
One of the organizations that is able to shade the youths in applying the tolerance values in Kutuk is IPNU and IPPNU (students association of Nahdlatul Ulama). Through the organization, the youths of Kutuk are very active and productive in several programs for growing the personal and social godly. One of the programs that uphold tolerance values and initiated by youths is gebyar ramadhan (the activities during Ramadhan). It is held on night of 22 and finished at night of 28 th Ramadan exactly. These youths are organizing various competitions that were followed by some delegation of every Mosque in Kutuk. Aside from competitions, all of community from various religions feel joy and join together seeing the competitions. From this program, it is reflected an existence of togetherness and supporting each other without making an issue of religion difference This youth organization teaches the youths about how to control emotion towards various differences. According to Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, known as Imam Al-Ghazali in his work, Ihya' Ulumuddin, it is termed with ilaj al-ghadhab (controlling emotion). One of the real actions as training effort and managing emotional stability of Kutuk's young people is through discussion performance of cross religion. The other of real action is through formation of committee by democratic in various activities. Unwittingly, it is inviting the youths in developing emotional stability by respecting and accepting various intern difference which exists. Muslim youths also accept and support the existence of "Buddhist Youth", which is an organization for Buddhist youth in Kutuk. This can be seen in the cooperation among them in village cleanup events. The youths also make defense efforts through the tahlilan selapanan also they often get some advices from local kyai in mosque or public speech.
Tolerance education in Kutuk is running continuously up to now. The reason is that adult people also need education as holding on life. It is approved there is difference in implementing of tolerance education based on Islam for the adult with the group of youth in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus. It is common, remembering the condition of adult education based 0n Jarvis that adult learners bring their own: experience to the learning situation, meaning systems to the learning situation and needs to the timing situation (Jarvis 2012: 144). So here in Kutuk, education for the adult is designed to help them realizing of application of what they have learned about tolerance.
Based on the condition of adult education in Kutuk, the education method that is used to teach tolerance is friendship method (called silaturahmi), it is an interaction between Muslim in developing Islamic education. Evidently, this method is most popular method in Islamic education. This method is very familiar and used in every activity of Islamic education practical in Kutuk community, such as pengajian and tahlilan. In various of these activities, people not only gathering for reading tahlil, but also practice tolerance values and pass this education through generations.
Kutuk has a lot of Majelis Taklim for ladies and gentlemen. The Sunday night of Kliwonan (minggu kliwon is one of Javanese calendar) is specialized for gentlemen. It is beginning by reciting tahlil and continued with pengajian (recitation) at Majelis Taklim. One of the essences that is always gotten after coming back from recitation is that Kutuk community should always support the existence of difference and cannot want to be the first winner. It is shown that tolerance values transmission is also organized through recitation.
This condition is also reliable for women in Kutuk, they have various informal religion institutions (majelis taklim) such as Muslimat (women's organization of Nahdlatul Ulama), as a part of activity from this informal religion institution (majelis taklim) for putting tolerance values, social activities are considered important to do and to develop in Kutuk. This activity is such as compensation for orphans, the poor and the old people, visiting people who sick, visiting family who has passed away, share work, even hold special craft training for moms, sometimes moms from non-Muslim also join to follow the training activity.
The transmission of tolerance values towards Kutuk community also occur through the sermon of Friday. One of Khatib (someone who delivering the sermon of Friday) named Mr. Wardi Mas'ud ever mentions the tolerance limitations. That is as long as about worlds affairs. It is still in tolerance scope and also the inviting is for respecting and admitting variously of existing difference. He emphasized that "the difference is natural. If you find differences, you do not need to make them equal. But we must believe that Islam is the most correct. But we also do not have the right to blame other religions".
For realizing the formation of Muslim community in this Kutuk Village, kyai is a model in community who is holding main role, creating uswah hasanah in how to be tolerance in the middle of various differences. Kyai always give examples by visiting each other among religious leaders in Kutuk for just visiting or when there is specific business like visiting sick people and assisting with building house. It was found that tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk, Kudus has been having connectivity since childhood till now. And also, it occurs the synergy from Tri Sentra education which is very good in this village. Naturally, if Kutuk has community of tolerating Muslim, because its living is based on tolerance education system throughout life.
The reality in the field shows that Kutuk adult people also learn through adult associations. It is highly needed because education is an activity to develop entire of human personality aspects that run for life (Basri 2009: 53). The concept is appropriate with an expression about the instruction to seek knowledge since birth to the grave.
Apart from that, the majority of Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus community are devout followers of Nahdlatul Ulama. So, they apply the patterns that are determined by Nahdlatul Ulama, including the concept of Tolerance. Here is the unique of tolerance education of Kutuk. Besides an effort to instill tolerance since child and continues without any disconnect, community also complement by getting used the typical practices of Nahdliyin community as a defense effort to keep immutability of Iman and Islam. So, the community is avoided from possibility of excessive tolerance.
Commanded by kyai's in Kutuk, community take magical power blessing, and also obedient towards kyai. Parents are taught to be tolerant Muslim through various majelis taklim (an informal religion institution) and activities of community, including khotbah and reflection of kyai's attitude. One of the kyai who became the inspiration for being tolerant was KH. Ahmad Syahid, who died approximately 25 years ago. He is a humble figure who always shows respect for people of other religions. In fact, majelis taklim is not only tahlilan, yasinan but also occur the tolerance value transmission through discourse and utilization of social activities. Its benefits will bring till the house, that is applied in daily life and transmitted as hold on life of their children.
In addition, children are prepared to be tolerant Muslim through institution of Islamic education whose teaching is rejecting the violence and tend to lead the habituation aspects.
The children will grow to become the youths who are ready to implement peer education. They are given confidence and provided place for exploring their abilities, one of the ways is by organization called IPNU-IPPNU (Student association of NU). They organize several activities to improve their tolerant attitude, including through discussion of cross religion. They are also involved in supporting effort and appreciating the existence of other religion. As being waitress in Vesak celebration on province level held in Kutuk, Undaan Kudus. Certainly, the youths are under instruction, guidance and supervision of kyai's and elder of Nahdlatul Ulama in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus.
Here, the youths are still continuing the amaliyah (religion practices based on Islamic organization) which has been taught since childhood as defense effort through activities like tahlilan (a tradition by reading words of du'a taken in holy Quran and given to someone who has passed away) and selapanan (religion activity which held once every 35 days) The succession of tolerance education in Kutuk cannot be released from the prayer. So, the power of du'a exists in every step of implementation of tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk Undaan Kudus. Kyai's are blessing their community, parents are blessing their children, and children are also blessing their parents. In every activity, it is always finished with du'a lead by Kyai. So, one of the ways taken in succession of tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus, is education with prayer.

The Component of Tolerance Education Based on Islam
Education is a system containing with several elements where an element with other element is interrelated. The recognition of several Kutuk Community show that the education has the important position in forming tolerance behavior of community in Kutuk, Kudus. They also declare that the family is an important element in transmitting tolerance values toward children. Beside the family, community also has significant role in forming tolerance.
The tolerance education based on Islam in the family and community in Kutuk Undaan Kudus cannot be implemented with the formalized provisions like what happened on the school. In the family, this education is implemented based on strong emotional bond between parents and children, even with another member of family. It begins with the awareness that the children are gift by Allah. So, its implementation is sociable. We are focusing the components of tolerance In the community, the tolerance education based on Islam is implemented through utilizing adult gathering and empowerment of youth organization. There, not only the regular meeting, but also happens the process of transmission tolerance values. Nevertheless, education in various forms (family and community) certainly consists of the components though its This tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk is considered successful and can accompany Muslim community in Kutuk to be tolerant Muslim. Throughout the history, it has never been the intolerance case in Kutuk. Moreover, it has never been Muslim in Kutuk who is converted into other religion. The same with the Muslim children in Kutuk which are not interested to join the Sunday Budhha School. The main factor is the tolerance education that is balanced with the defense effort toward the faith and Islam. The children are already accustomed to amaliyah of Nahdlatul Ulama. Evidently, it has been big impact on the growth of tolerance and the ability to maintain the strength of faith and Islam of someone.

Family and Community Empowerment
In general, a child is known as a good or bad child within their social circle, by community, is from their parents status and credibility. It is considered right because the responsibility of the parent in the family is to educate, maintain and protect all of the family members. Also, with the surroundings of children, it definitely becomes the second question after the family. Because someone must be socialized with something in their environment.
Before going to the family and community, the steps that need to be attention for supervising the implementation of tolerance education based on Islam in the family and community, the first; changing the old view of community about education, that education is not only in the formal environment like school, however it is the compound process involving the family and community.
Second, righting the community assumption, that education is not only giving factual knowledges (transfer of knowledge) but also occurring the process of values transmission. Third, the leader of community should have attractiveness as the model and internal dialog connector among religious people. Many things can't be done by the government but can be done better by the leader of community. Because in general, the leader of community has a model as caretaker of traditional norms which is very powerful used as control mechanism to face the change. Fourth, religious teaching is not only oriented to the individual worship, but also oriented to social worship. So, someone will have the high social sensitivity.
This implementation of tolerance education based on Islam needs the synergy of all educational institutions, based on the considerations that the family is the first education place for creating the personal and character. Meanwhile, the school is educational environment where the children have more knowledge for living in the community for next moment. Both of the institutions, family and the school, are as preparation for entering the real life in the middle of community.
It needs the existence of family 4 empowerment to support this concept. And the community is as the part of executor of the transmission of tolerance values. The tolerance needs teaching to the children since childhood, so that when they are starting to socialize with their friends it will not impact the conflict because of the different existing. In this family environment, children can be introduced with various differences from themselves and other family member. One method that can be used in the implementation of tolerance education based on Islam in the family is the exemplary method, habituation, advices, and also story method.
Furthermore, there must be the empowerment effort of community. In the environment of community, we often see the ladies and gentlemen following pengajian (general term used to refer to the various religious activities like learning and teaching activities), in Mosques and the other majelis. There, the Interaction and the transmissions of values occur. Evidently, silaturahim is a famous Islamic education method, even till today. It is still used in several activities of Islamic education in the community such as pengajian (general term used to refer to the various religious activities like learning and teaching activities), Yasinan, (an event to read one letter of the Holy Quran) etc.
The community also has youth association. The transmission of tolerance values can implement through empowerment of youth organization. They also need impowering by giving the trust and the opportunity. So, the youths will make possible effort for utilizing their potential and ability better.
The tolerance education of community has the larger scope compared with there has been in the family. Because community is as the place someone meets the real differences. One that can be done by presenting various Ulama's consideration in Fiqh learning (one of the Islamic sciences that discuses about the legal issue of various aspects of human life) or in the khutbah (the speech that delivered toward the follower of Islam) and the other place for gathering (majelis). However, it needs to be balanced by familiarizing the specific practices (amalan) to maintain the safe position and to avoid the confusing teaching also to save the self-identity.
One of the key holders of the success of tolerance education based on Islam in the community of Kutuk, Undaan, Kudus is kyai. He has big control toward the creation of change in community. Because he is charismatic leader. Refer to the Weber theory, 5 charismatic leaders are based on individuals who have special abilities extraordinary characteristics that are 5 Term ''Charisma'' used to several character that have by someone and different with the others in general, so they are treated as the people who are blessed with supernatural abilities, superman, and have the power and ability specifically amazing. Several privileges can't be seen by ordinary people (Weber 1968:48). believed by their followers and can create a radical and dynamic change (Upe 2010: 207). So, the community has very high trust in kyai, and community will believe and do what kyai say without more thinking. 6 In addition, Kutuk community made kyai as a mirror in being tolerant. They will imitate what kyai does, including how to be tolerant.
The position of kyai in the community is a strategic position, that can lead the community become tolerant Muslim. The range region of kyai is also very large. It Starts from the children till the adult even elderly. Generally, all of them are learning with kyai and always getting spiritual advices so that there is a balance between the world and hereafter. Moreover, no one of village community dares or act violence towards kyai. Uniquely, kyai is able to give blessings for their follower. So, many unexpected blessings due to takdzim (very respectful and polite) toward kyai. In the several opportunities, kyai is asked to pray, including praying for the community of Kutuk Undaan Kudus became tolerant Muslim. This prayer is one of the secret keys that is able to turn Kutuk community into tolerant Muslim.
The eternal power of ulama' in Muslim community appropriately comes from their function as the soul saver and their influence towards the hope of villagers for eternal salvation. Although ulama like to display their function as the light and medicine for the mind and dark future (Horikoshi 1987: 168). So, it needs to strengthen in order to success in implementation of Islamic tolerance education.

CONCLUSION
The Kutuk Villagers is tolerant, and they are the villagers miniature in Kudus Central Java, particularly in terms of tolerance values. Throughout the history, the community can maintain so there is no conflict in the name of religion take place in the village. The community in this village are fully aware of the diversity of religious backgrounds. They understand that everyone has the right and obligation to obey their religious teachings. The principle is not to disturb each other. This condition is the heritage of their predecessors as loyal followers of Nahdliyin. The culture of Nahdliyin is used as a milestone of tolerance education through the empowerment of family and community. Both of them are under the influence of kyai. They reflected on the kyai how to be tolerant Muslims.
The pattern of tolerance education based on Islam in Kutuk Village is using lifelong educational cycle. Children with education in their family, the youths with the peer education through youth organization, and the adult with their Majelis Taklim (place for gathering and learning). It is the evidence in the village that these religious educational institutions have contributed significantly to educate Muslim to be socially and theologically pious adherents of Islam. Taking this into account, still there some resistance to the amaliyah of nahdliyyin, such as yasinan, tahlilan, and berjanjenan.
Lastly, the previous explanation concludes that there are methods that utilized in the process of transmitting tolerance values known as education bil hal (education with behavior and action), education bil maqol (education via oral tradition), and education bil du'a (education with prayers). Moreover, for the success of tolerance education implementation, it is necessary to reempower the role of the family and society as educational institutions.